lifted The FA Cup

in the early hours of sunday morning a great war began
such had not been seen before
the evil Manchester United "Red Devils"
and the valiant Arsenal "The Gunners" took to the field
with my brother Henry (french name pronounced "onree") out injured
and a full strength Machester United squad
both teams with nothing to lose and everything to gain
this was always going to be a close and spiteful match
and so it was though no goals were scored in match time or extra time
Manchester may have had most of the best chances
but never were able to put one onto the score board
so in the end after ninety minutes of play, and 30 mins of extra time
the match was still locked at 0-0
to the penalty shoot-out it came
one on one, one by one the players shot for their teams chance at glory
only the goalkeepers stood in their way
and as it came to the red headed red devils man Paul Scholes
a trusted brilliant man
his shot was struck with some accuracy
but it was the hands of The Gunners big German Jens Lehnmann that kept it out
so with the scores locked once again at 4-4 in the shoot-out best of five
The Gunners had the last say with one more shot
the giant of a Frenchman Patrick Vieira stepped up to the mark and put that ball into the back of the net
Arsenal had won, Machester United had lost and it was always theirs to lose
and with great joy Vieira once again lifted The FA Cup

just the way Lucas wanted it

we went
we watched
we cheered
were captivated
and my love has only grown more after the finale of the Star Wars saga
it was the 12:01 session
and the fans were out in force in Ballarat (although some guy did bring his girlfriend, who obviously wasn't a fan, getting up in the middle of the movie and squeezing past going and coming back!!!)
yet still it was a night to be cherished
one that i will remember for a long time
and now the story has been wrapped up
just the way Lucas wanted it
just the way he had written it
a long time ago

Star Wars: Don't do these things or you might find a light saber up your ass!

1001 things not to do at Star Wars Episode III: Revenge Of The Sith
Star Wars: Message Boards

sometimes

sometimes you don't need words
you need a hug
sometimes you don't need a hug
you need a good smack over the head
sometimes you need all three

out of bounds

went to the "out of bounds church?" book launch last night
the book of which i am yet to read since i only got it yesterday, slack i know, looks quite good, it is by Steve Taylor / emergent kiwi, and has been published on the Emergent YS arm of Zondervan publishing, meaning it should be pretty easy to get a hold of no matter where you are
was a good night, hosted by Forge as one of their postcards nights and NCCC, where A Taste of Liquid was held earlier in the year
some interesting things were brought up by Steve during the night and some good questions too
one of the main things i found interesting was him talking about looking at a piece of rope that is frayed at an end and seeing our ancestors intertwined as each strand making it strong, this is a metaphor used from the movie Whalerider
and how if you look at Jesus ancestors that there were some people in their who did some pretty bad things and weren't really poeple that at times you would not be proud to say they are you relatives
this showed me how the emerging church needs to recognise and stay connected and in some way intertwined with the established church, eventhough there are so many things in the past and even now that the emerging church see as so ugly and horrible that staying connected is important
i think an emerging church totally apart from the rest of the Church (catholic/universal), if we are going to be the Church then we have to accept the baggage that may come with that, and yes learn too from the mistakes of the past
after all you can't choose your parents and nor could they, that's, out of bounds

but there is something about Melbourne and it sure ain't the weather

so i had a trip to Melbourne this week,
was going down to see Heather off at the airport,
she left for Japan on tuesday
and i had an orthadontist appointment today
so i figured there was no point in making two trips to Melbourne in one week
and stayed at my Nana's place in Mt Waverly and caught up with her
that was cool, haven't seen her since christmas and she is having a hard time at the moment, she made me chocolate mud muffins yummy, thanks Nana
i also caught up with my best mate Dave and his fiance (as of just recent) Rosie
so that was cool, talked a little about their wedding and the sick cars we will be riding to the wedding in, good on ya Geoff (he is Rosies dad, lined up the cars)
they came with me to the Forge postcards night at NCCC, it was Steve Taylor's book launch for "Out of bounds church?" in Australia, that was cool, cause Dave and Rosie hadn't really had anything to do with the emerging church before and so they kinda got introduced to some of the stuff to do with the EC, and stuff that i have been getting gradually into
didn't know what to expect though, hadn't been to a book launch before
anyways will post about the launch later tonight
had a good time in Melbourne didn't end up apart of any accidents, it was my first time driving by myself in Melbourne, did have to avoid a couple though (Tab ingnore this bit), and learnt to drive in traffic, real traffic, not peack half hour in Ballarat traffic
did miss a few turns cause i was in the wrong lane and streets came quicker than i thought the would
ran into a friend Tui at Westfield Doncaster she works at Sportsco there i found out
so that was cool too
drove home today after getting in trouble from my orthordontist for losing my orthordontic plate, retainer, whatever, it is in my room somewhere, have to find it, don't think i want to have to tell my parents that i need a new one $$$ ouch
i do love Melbourne, even though i am a Sydney boy, New South Welshman, and always will be, but there is something about Melbourne and it sure ain't the weather

and so then there were two

and today Heather left
to start the next part of her journey
and so then there were two
and we wanted to watch her leave
but let her go

Which Jesus Are You Following?

i had the sermon spot at my church last night
i borrowed the Jesus talks with a gay man story and had it read out just before i got up
also used this sheet that had things on it to make you think about what Jesus looked like and if he lived today what he might be like, some of the things on the sheet included, hair, eyes, skin, no. of brothers and sisters, car, football team, music, how much could he benchpress, school grades, clothing, enemies, friends and more, thanks to Daniel Lansdowne a 16 yr old who came up with this sheet and used it in his small group last term, it really helped people think

here is some of the stuff i talked about and some of the questions i asked...

Which Jesus Are You Following?

Do you picture him as?
• A white man
• Middle/Upper class
• Drives a White Holden Calais with purple leather interior
• Owns a nice house in Lake Gardens (an upperclass area in Ballarat)

• A Middle Easterner
• Lower low class man
• Drives/pushes a rusted old Datson
• Homeless, lives in his car

(here i talked about how Jesus did un-expected things and that is never easy, people are normally shocked and/or don't tend to like it when you do things they don't expect of you)

What Did Jesus Do?

• John chapter 4 - was tired from a long walk so he sat wearily by a well in the middle of the day, and then talks with a woman who was of a race that Jews don’t associate with
• John chapter 9 - spat on the ground, used the spit to make mud, and smoothed it over a blind man’s eyes telling him then to go and wash to be healed


• Matthew chapter 9 - went and had dinner with Tax Collecting “scum”, the most hated people in town
• Matthew chapter 8 - let a Religious Teacher who wanted to follow him know about the kind of living style Jesus had and what he would be up for, the homeless style of living, finding where ever he could to lay his head


• John chapter 13 - takes off his robe (like took off his shirt) and wraps it around his waist and washes the his followers and close mates dirty dusty feet
• John chapter 2 – saw merchants selling cattle, sheep and doves for sacrifice in the Temple and money changers at tables, so he made a whip out of rope and chased them all out of the Temple. He then drove out the animals and overturned the money changer’s tables scattering the money, and told the dove merchants to get out!


• Matthew chapter 21 – went into the temple, drove out the merchants and customers and overturned the money changer’s tables and the stalls of the dove sellers, yelling how they had turned a place of prayer into a den of thieves!


Jesus lived the hard life,
did the un-expected,
said the un-expected,
and changed the world by doing so
What are you doing?,
how are you living?,
which Jesus are you following?

no one is exempt

the senior pastor at my church Steve, shared this story on sunday night, along with a challenge of the importance of Love

a story, with some adaptation, from John Duckworth in "Joan ’n’ the Whale" and other stories you never heard in Sunday School
**
Once upon a time way up in the mountains somewhere in Europe there was a peaceful little village. It was a quaint village with the unlikely name of St. Cold-as-ice-berg. Overshadowing this quiet village was the imposing grey edifice of the castle Van Gelical, the home of the maddest scientist of them all, the notorious, the infamous, Dr. Emil Van Gelical!

Deep in the eerily lit dungeon of this mighty castle there is a movement. A gaunt figure in a once-white lab coat, now stained with the evidence of his many notorious experiments, moves purposefully towards the operating table in the middle of the room. Yes, it is … Dr E. Van Gelical!

Under the dirty grey sheet lies a human form. Or is it human? As the doctor approaches the table he calls for his trusted assistant, "Igor, come quickly!"

Igor appears, shuffling across the floor, carrying a large cardboard box.

"It's time for my greatest experiment", pronounces the doctor

"Goody! I love experiments, master", wheezes Igor,

The doctor continues, "Tonight I will show the world who is a genius. Tonight will be my greatest triumph. I am going to achieve what no person has ever done before. I am going to create spiritual life!" All around lightning flashes and thunder roars.

"Tonight I will create CHRISTIANSTEIN! Christianstein, the greatest specimen of spiritual life the world has ever known. He will have everything. Everything! Let the operation begin."

As he speaks the doctor slowly pulls back the sheet, uncovering the inanimate form of a young man dressed in a white shirt, grey tie and blue polyester suit. Clean shaven, with short neat hair. A large black Bible by his side…

The operation begins. The equipping of his creation is at hand. "Igor give me the bottle marked, 'Voice of a great evangelist'." He draws the contents into a syringe and slowly injects the lifeless form on the table.

"Now the one marked, 'The courage of Stephen'," Igor hands him a dusty phial. "Also the ancient looking flask, the one containing the patience of Job." And so the operation continues for a long, long time… Eventually there are only a few small bottles with weirdly coloured fluids left. At Igor's inquiring glance Doc. Van Gelical explains, "Those are some special serums I have distilled. Now hand me a fresh syringe and we will continue."

"First a double dose of prayer and daily Bible reading", the liquid is injected into the limp arm.

Then - faithful Church attendance
- generous giving (can't have too much of that)
- temperance topped up with anti-extremism
- desire for volunteer work
- ability to resist temptation
- willingness to be on rosters
- cheerful obedience
- last, but not least, a triple dose of orthodoxy (Orthoxicol for churches). Very important that one.

The Doctor checks the list on his clipboard. Igor scours the boxes. Everything has been used; nothing has been left out,

Dr. Van Gelical moves over to the electrical control panel. The storm is still raging outside. He throws a massive switch on. Lightning bursts around them like a thousand suns, raw energy surges through the wires. The figure on the table begins to quiver.

"He's moving!", Igor shouts with glee,

Master and servant watch breathlessly as the thing called Christianstein slowly pulls itself up to a sitting position, then stiffly climbs from the table.

The doctor stands transfixed,... slowly he finds his voice, "Speak to me, my creation!"

The figure frowns, a low hostile growl comes from its throat (already practising for some church meetings), "If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but have not love..."

"Love? Love? What does he mean?" the doctor asks plaintively as he hurriedly examines his clipboard.

"If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have faith that can move mountains, but have not love..."

"Igor what does he mean, love?"

"I don’t know master," Igor snivels as he cringes and crawls under the table.

"If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I ... gain... nothing!"

"Nothing? Not even a teensy, little something?"

"AAArgh!!!" the creature bellows as it hurls itself at him and then off into the night.

"Igor, you fool! I knew we left out something ... such a little thing.”

All Igor could stammer was, "I…, I…, I think ... we ... created… a... monster.”
**

my adaptation of this story

**
Once upon a time way up in the mountains somewhere in Europe there was a peaceful little village. It was a quaint village with the unlikely name of St. Cold-as-ice-berg. Overshadowing this quiet village was the imposing grey edifice of the castle Mergent, the home of the maddest scientist of them all, the notorious, the infamous, Dr. Emil Mergent!

Deep in the eerily lit dungeon of this mighty castle there is a movement. A gaunt figure in a once-white lab coat, now stained with the evidence of his many notorious experiments, moves purposefully towards the operating table in the middle of the room. Yes, it is … Dr E. Mergent!

Under the dirty grey sheet lies a human form. Or is it human? As the doctor approaches the table he calls for his trusted assistant, "Igor, come quickly!"

Igor appears, shuffling across the floor, carrying a large cardboard box.

"It's time for my greatest experiment", pronounces the doctor

"Goody! I love experiments, master", wheezes Igor,

The doctor continues, "Tonight I will show the world who is a genius. Tonight will be my greatest triumph. I am going to achieve what no person has ever done before. I am going to create spiritual life!" All around lightning flashes and thunder roars.

"Tonight I will create CHRISTIANSTEIN! Christianstein, the greatest specimen of spiritual life the world has ever known. He will have everything. Everything! Let the operation begin."

As he speaks the doctor slowly pulls back the sheet, uncovering the inanimate form of a young man dressed in a black t-shirt, trucker hat and blue denim jeans. Slightly un-shaven, with long dreadlocked hair. A small gospel of mark message by his side…

The operation begins. The equipping of his creation is at hand. "Igor give me the bottle marked, 'Incarnational thinking of an evengelist'." He draws the contents into a syringe and slowly injects the lifeless form on the table.

"Now the one marked, 'The courage of Stephen'," Igor hands him a dusty phial. "Also the ancient looking flask, the one containing the patience of Job." And so the operation continues for a long, long time… Eventually there are only a few small bottles with weirdly coloured fluids left. At Igor's inquiring glance Doc. Mergent explains, "Those are some special serums I have distilled. Now hand me a fresh syringe and we will continue."

"First a double dose of prayer and daily Bible reading", the liquid is injected into the limp arm.

Then
- postmordenism
- specific emerging incarnational leadership training
- faithful emergent home church attendance
- generous giving (can't have too much of that)
- brodering extremism
- living dangerously
- spirituality
- volunteer worker
- ability to resist temptation
- beer drinker
- full participation
- feed the hungry
- culturally relevant
- blogs
- last, but not least, a triple dose of incarnational and contextual evangelism. Very important that one.

The Doctor checks the list on his clipboard. Igor scours the boxes. Everything has been used; nothing has been left out,

Dr. Mergent moves over to the electrical control panel. The storm is still raging outside. He throws a massive switch on. Lightning bursts around them like a thousand suns, raw energy surges through the wires. The figure on the table begins to quiver.

"He's moving!", Igor shouts with glee,

Master and servant watch breathlessly as the thing called Christianstein slowly pulls itself up to a sitting position, then stiffly climbs from the table.

The doctor stands transfixed,... slowly he finds his voice, "Speak to me, my creation!"

The figure frowns, a low hostile growl comes from its throat (already practising for some small home church meetings), "If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy, but don't love..."

"Love? Love? What does he mean?" the doctor asks plaintively as he hurriedly examines his clipboard.

"If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love..."

"Igor what does he mean, love?"

"I don’t know master," Igor snivels as he cringes and crawls under the table.

"If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere!"

"Nowhere? Not even a teensy, little somewhere?"

"AAArgh!!!" the creature bellows as it hurls itself at him and then off into the night.

"Igor, you fool! I knew we left out something ... such a little thing.”

All Igor could stammer was, "I…, I…, I think ... we ... created… a... monster.”
**

It's not just mainstream chruches who can create monsters, emerging churches can too, no one is exempt and we all need God's love in our lives, and we have plenty to give out

you probably won't work out how

i have been having some difficulties this year, and it has been eating away at me
just recently i was beginning to see a side of the old me coming back that i really don't like and this was really disturbing me, it was time to do something or who knows what would happen
so after taking some advice from some close friends, i decided that what they said was good, but i thought it could be resolved better, so i decided to take a different path of action, from the one they advised me
well so far so good, things aren't totally better or anything, but are on the mend
see i had been trying to do nothing, which wasn't helping, so even though it is gonna cost me, time - money - effort, i figured out i needed to help the situation to get better instead of watching it get worse
funny how standing there watching something get worse doesn't help at all hey
my situation and my proactive choice reminded me of something the Apostle Paul once wrote to the Romans although my suffering isn't really worthy of being called such in comparison to what they may have been going through

"because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope."

cause really it makes sense that it takes difficult times to build character, you don't grow in character by just cruising along with no worries
same as unless you persevere you probably won't work out how to best deal with your situation