hopefully I can sort this out
"Our God is an awesome God"
"How great is our God"
These are two songs that get to me, and not because I don't like them, because I do, but because I find myself standing there before God asking myself "so why when I come to talk with my friends and others that I know and meet who don't know God can I not explain to them how great and awesome he is?"
Have I forgotten what God has done for me in my life? maybe.
Do I just think that because they might not feel that they need forgiveness from God because hey they haven't really done anything that bad, and so they wonder why Jesus had to live, die and rise again? I think this is a rationalisation on my behalf to not tell people about this part, although it's an important bit.
Do I think that God hasn't really done anything awesome or great in my life and so don't have anything to say on that? I think I would be lying if I said that.
I do feel like I would hit the same wall and answer as the young enthusiastic evangelist from South Africa who went to a group of young men saying to them that he had discovered this revolutionary movement that was life changing and all about love, real love. That they were this amazing community of people who lived extraordinary lives, loving each other and all people no matter their race or lifestyle. And when the young men replied fantastic where can we find this Jesus Church and see this, he replied "oh well there aren't any here...."
I also at the same time feel like I am apart of the problem. And that i can't blame everyone else, I know in the end it is my life and like as in Kingdom of Heaven
"A king may move a man, a father may claim a son. But remember that, even when those who move you be kings or men of power, your soul is in your keeping alone. When you stand before God you cannot say but I was told by others to do thus or that virtue was not convinient at the time. This will not suffice. Remember that."
I can't stand before God and say well but everyone else was like that or but other people didn't do that.
I think that i expect that others will expect so much of me that I can't live up to right now and that I need permission to suck at being like Jesus so that I can have permission to grow. I think I am finding that we need to wear our imperfections on the outside so that we can give others around us the permission to suck at being like Jesus and grow, so that they don't feel like they have to live up to your standards before they can go any further.
I think I need to do more of what I say I believe and start to actually believe it.
If I really do believe not just think that God is so great and awesome than I know I will live it not just think it.
What I think and believe are two different things, hopefully I can sort this out.
"How great is our God"
These are two songs that get to me, and not because I don't like them, because I do, but because I find myself standing there before God asking myself "so why when I come to talk with my friends and others that I know and meet who don't know God can I not explain to them how great and awesome he is?"
Have I forgotten what God has done for me in my life? maybe.
Do I just think that because they might not feel that they need forgiveness from God because hey they haven't really done anything that bad, and so they wonder why Jesus had to live, die and rise again? I think this is a rationalisation on my behalf to not tell people about this part, although it's an important bit.
Do I think that God hasn't really done anything awesome or great in my life and so don't have anything to say on that? I think I would be lying if I said that.
I do feel like I would hit the same wall and answer as the young enthusiastic evangelist from South Africa who went to a group of young men saying to them that he had discovered this revolutionary movement that was life changing and all about love, real love. That they were this amazing community of people who lived extraordinary lives, loving each other and all people no matter their race or lifestyle. And when the young men replied fantastic where can we find this Jesus Church and see this, he replied "oh well there aren't any here...."
I also at the same time feel like I am apart of the problem. And that i can't blame everyone else, I know in the end it is my life and like as in Kingdom of Heaven
"A king may move a man, a father may claim a son. But remember that, even when those who move you be kings or men of power, your soul is in your keeping alone. When you stand before God you cannot say but I was told by others to do thus or that virtue was not convinient at the time. This will not suffice. Remember that."
I can't stand before God and say well but everyone else was like that or but other people didn't do that.
I think that i expect that others will expect so much of me that I can't live up to right now and that I need permission to suck at being like Jesus so that I can have permission to grow. I think I am finding that we need to wear our imperfections on the outside so that we can give others around us the permission to suck at being like Jesus and grow, so that they don't feel like they have to live up to your standards before they can go any further.
I think I need to do more of what I say I believe and start to actually believe it.
If I really do believe not just think that God is so great and awesome than I know I will live it not just think it.
What I think and believe are two different things, hopefully I can sort this out.
posted by John M @ 12:27 am
1 Comments:
At 25 June, 2007 10:17,
Tab said…
Hey there Johnman!
Good questions here. Sounds like you need to spend some time in discipleship [fancy a yr in Broken Hill?]
I think that one of the things that has helped me most in the past few years, is to gain a clear understanding of what "the Kingdom of God" entails, and my place in it. To think of oneself as a disciple, first and foremost is a good place to be. It allows you to screw up [like they all did] yet to acknowledge the fact [no hiding it] repent [Jesus quickly forgives] and to move furthur on the road to becoming like the Master.
Its good to understand how good and awesome our God is, and to praise him for what he's done in your life. Be mindful too that this generation of postmodern thinkers [with few exceptions] wont give a shit about what's happened in your life unless they can experience it themselves. Even without a Christian community present it is possible to give people glimpses of the Kingdom. Those glimpses are all around, in stories, movies, songs, nature, in you and in them. Pointing out where the Father has already been in touch with them, and being his worker, touching them with the Kingdom - these are the things that will help people understand what the Kingdom of God is about. And even then, just like the parable of the workers in the vineyard, they may still "shoot the messenger" rejecting God's Kingdom, and thats their choice.
Stick with it! and read the parables in Matthew Mark and Luke. There's a lot there.
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